News

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Appeal: Socks are not just for Xmas

Every year millions of socks are bought as gifts at Christmas. The buyers’ intentions are usually good, to provide a loving home, warm washing machine and regular walks. But a shocking new study has shown that 98.87% of Xmas socks are discarded after only one week. The study was funded by the National Association of […]

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Boris Johnson to appear on Andrew Neil, 13th December

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Trump runs home crying from creche after other kids laugh at him

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Greggs new vegan product – including pork pie flavoured vitamins

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Science

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Man celebrates completing diet after skipping one meal

David Jason (44) from Hendon, London, is holding a small celebration this weekend to mark the completion of his first diet in 17 years. David told his friends of his relief at being able to eat normally again. “Yesterday I skipped lunch but today I’m really happy I can eat as much as I like […]

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New Smartwatch ensures you’re always fashionably late

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Report: Consuming water addictive

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UN report shows vegan diet contributes to climate change

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Sport

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Local Jewish sports team delighted to have taken part

North West London Jewish sports team Maccabi Somethingorother has played a game this week. Manager and Head coach Asher Garfunklavich told the Daily Jews he was delighted his team had taken part. “They say it’s the taking part that counts, it’s true”, he told us.” The team are in a league with other teams who […]

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Spurs consult fans on best word to slur Jews

SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA - JULY 20: Natalie Portman of Marvel Studios' 'Thor: Love and Thunder' at the San Diego Comic-Con International 2019 Marvel Studios Panel in Hall H on July 20, 2019 in San Diego, California. (Photo by Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images for Disney)

Natalie Portman to become professional Hammer Thrower

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English fans overjoyed as people they don’t know and never met win a game

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UK Politics

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Corbyn’s clone to stand in leadership election

Jeremy Corbyn’s biological clone has announced he will be standing for the Labour leadership. The clone, named as Jeremy+ Corbyn, was created three years ago as a backup plan by campaign group Momentum should the original Corbyn be hit by a bus or even more unlikely, lose the election. Jon Lansman, token Jew of Momentum, […]

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Corbyn to join board of Estee Lauder after crushing election defeat

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Chief Rabbi to Corbyn ‘this is what happens when you fuck with the Jews’

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Johnson ‘can’t believe they fell for it’

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