Polling company accused of “pro-Jewish” bias

Polling company Ipsos-Mori is being accused of being too pro-Jewish.

The claim made by the Federation of Antisemites Sadistic Cunts Islamophobes Sociopaths and Theatre-critics or FASCIST is that Ipsos-Mori is, in fact, a man called Morris Ipsosovich who lives in North Hackney.

The FASCIST group went on to say that Mr Ipsosovich was good at polling people because “Jews like to count (money)” and “don’t stop asking questions.”

A statement from Ipsos-Mori read “Mr Ipsosovich is a Roman Catholic, he has enough of his own guilt to have to take this on, already”.

During a press conference from his Islington allotment, Jeremy Corbyn told reporters, it was a total coincidence that he was on stage with FASCIST leaders at a rally and that he’s never heard them say anything wrong in any case. He went on to say “Please stop picking on me. I just want to be the first trainspotter to become Prime Minister, is that too much to ask?.”

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