Israel to grant citizenship to all Israeli cats in an effort to address demographic ‘crisis’.

Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has announced a new initiative to address the demographic time bomb which has been identified as a major threat to the Jewish state.

Whilst technically not Jewish, cats in Israel are known to be very racist and dislike Arabs including Mizrachi Jews. They are likely on-the-whole to vote for Ashkenazi, Jewish parties.

Recent polling has shown that cats in Israel would overwhelmingly vote for Likud if they were given the vote. This may be due to the free milk for cats pledge that Netanyahu made before the last election.

62% of cats polled would vote for Likud, whilst 19% would vote for the Blue and White party, 10% would vote for Labour and the remaining split between other parties and some independent cats.

The Daily Jews asked the head of the Jerusalemite Cats Association for comment but he was busy licking his testicles.

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