Makers of BroigusApp to release ShpilkesApp
The makers of successful mobile phone application BroigusApp which is now being used by most of the worlds Jewish population have announced a companion app called ShpilkesApp. Founder of BroigusInc the company behind the apps told us “I’ve made so much money from the first one, but I still can’t afford a house in Tel […]
Gay school agrees to add religion to curriculum
Queer Manor, the upmarket public school for LGBTQ+ students, has announced they will reluctantly add religion to their curriculum. The announcement comes after a report released by the Independent Schools Inspectorate, called out the impact the lack of religious education may have on the pupils later in life. James McVities, Chief Executive of the ISI, […]
Teenage Boris fan delighted at ‘cool’ Tory new cabinet
Teenage Boris Johnson superfan, Tarquin Smith, has told friends this week that he is delighted at the new government cabinet that the PM has announced. Tarquin, who is 15 lives in Cambridge with his parents, Lord Terrance Johson Smith of Trailbend, a former fortune 100 CEO and Elizabeth Anne Beatrice Diana Smith. He says there […]
Boris offers £300m to anyone that disagrees with Brexit
In a bold manoeuvre designed to shore up support for his Brexit policies, Prime Minister Boris Johnson has announced a new initiative. The Prime Minister says he will be offering £300m to any group that doesn’t agree with him. So far Mr Johnson has offered the city of Liverpool and Scotland £300m each to keep […]
Natalie Portman to become professional Hammer Thrower
Movie star and every Jewish man’s wet dream, Natalie Portman, has announced that she will be retiring from acting to take up track and field. Ms Portman, who is tragically happily married, will be focussing on Hammer Throwing as her sport. In an exclusive interview, she talked to the Daily Jews about her inspiration and […]
How to be antisemitic and original
Here at The Daily Jews HQ in Fleet Street, Hendon, we’re tired of the same old boring antisemitism that gets bandied around. After a couple of thousand years, you’d think the goyim would come up with some better insults? Yes we have a big nosesYes we’re all wealthyYes we control the worldYes we eat Christian […]
Zionist underground training camp uncovered in Kingsbury
An undercover reporter working for Al Jazeera has exposed an underground training camp in Kingsbury, North West London. The journalist Clayton Swisher previously worked on the famous Al Jazeera documentary, ‘The Lobby’, which proved that a cabal of Zionists controls the UK. He is working on a new documentary which will show how children as […]
New app tracks which of your friends and family are broigus with you
This reviewer found the app very easy to use. I synced my phone contacts and Facebook friends with ease, I managed to block 34 people in moments. I especially enjoyed setting up my broigus anniversaries. For example, I set-up a notification that said: “On this day in 1996 Doniel Richjew had the Moskowitzes for Shabbos dinner and didn’t think to invite me”.
Remains of oldest known Wanker discovered in a cave in Cheshire
Archaeologists this week announced an exciting new discovery, the oldest known Wanker, found near the remains of the famous Lindow Man. Jizzer Jim, as he is being called, was found preserved in ejaculate leading anthropologists to conjecture that he may have been the recipient of a large, ancient bukake ceremony. Analysis of the bones in […]
Jeremy Corbyn releases leaflet on antisemitism with personal examples…
Embattled Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn, this weekend emailed Labour members with a new five-page leaflet on antisemitism which only took his team four years to write. In an email linking to the leaflet, Mr Corbyn tells party members “there’s no place for antisemitism in our movement”… going on to list the various Labour allied groups […]
